Eat Crap = Feel Like Crap

Food Addiction is a disease of isolation. No wonder I haven't posted in three days! I've been feeling like crap. I have been having trouble staying abstinent and eating according to my program. It has been difficult, and sometimes I don't know why I am doing it, it just happens. I know it is wrong. I know it is bad for me, but I just have something inside me that won't let me say no. Each day I try to fight that little voice, and somedays I win, somedays I lose.

I feel good today, and I have hope, but the day is not over yet. I only have one day at a time, and I need to focus on getting through each day with intent. I plan to make a lot of calls later this evening to people who recovering in program. I want to ask questions and find out some good tools and tips when I want to take the bite.. and to stop taking the bite and not continue to binge. I am still recovering from surgery, and I think that going through both recoveries has something to do with the mental recovery required for my eating plan.

It has been two weeks since surgery, and I am doing well. The incision is almost closed completely on the outside, and I will be taking out my second drain sometime this week. I have started to use coconut oil on my scar, because I read that it helps reduce scarring. I don't know if it will actually do anything, but what could it hurt? At least I will have a soft abdomen either way.

I took some more post-op pictures, and here they are. I hope you enjoy.